“I am so BUSY” (said every woman I know!) Busy, for some reason, is perceived as a really good thing. It is equated with success. Being busy means you are getting shit done and - let’s be real - we all want to get shit done. My challenge to you is to get things done and not be so flippin' busy.
Personally, when I say I am busy it makes me feel important. If I am honest with myself, I don't really like it. I have been exploring my busy-ness for some time and the most dominant feeling that comes up when I am NOT busy is guilt. I should be doing something, right?
We are a culture of very busy people and not being "busy" is challenging. Busy is also a set up for disappointment and quite possibly a feeling of failure. What happens when all that busy does not turn up the results we were expecting? Then what? We ignored our people and what’s important to us and we have to start again. Guess what?Here comes more busy.
In a quick Google search for the word busy:
"She was too busy to enjoy herself" is how busy is defined in a sentence. Then I dug a little deeper into the internet and found this:
"If you want to really mess with someone tell them you are NOT busy".
I love this idea. When we really think about it, busy is a feeling that we create for ourselves. We run around from one thing to the next getting shit done but in reality we are missing the moment. I do it to avoid guilt. Is there something you are avoiding by being so damn busy? What thoughts are you trying not to have that are keeping you in the cycle of busy?
When my patients talk about being busy and being overwhelmed by their to-do lists I let them know this:
"When the to-do list is done, well... It means you are dead". Not my most soft and fuzzy bedside approach but it is true. We can always find a reason and a way to be busy. It is not a way to live. In doing so we are missing the point and missing the moment. From one who is always busy - trust me the laundry will still be there but those moments with your people will be missed.
Notice what happens when you decide to not be busy - it is a choice - your thoughts will expand - there may be some anxiety at first but see if you can experience the thoughts and feelings behind the angst. Expand into that and let all the good and weird feelings come - be present and enjoy the moment.
Do nothing today girl
You deserve it